Christmas Humor

T'was The Night Before Christmas - Hip Style

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the pad
Not a hip cat was swinging and that's nowhere, dad
The stove was hung up in the stocking routine
In hopes that the fat man would soon make the scene.

The kids had all had it so they hit their sacks
And me and the bride had just begun to relax
When there started a rumble that came on real frantic
So I opened the window to figure the panic.

I saw a square short that was makin' fat tracks
Bein' pulled by eight dogs who were wearing hat racks
And a funny old geezer was flippin' his lid
He told 'em to "make it," and man, like, they did!

I couldn't help diggin' the scene on the roof
As I stood there just waiting for chubby to goof.
They stood by the chimney in bunches and clusters
'Till chubby slid down coming on like gang busters.

His threads were the squarest and I just had to chuckle
In front (not in back) was his Ivy League buckle.
The mop on his chin hid his button-down collar
And with that red nose, man, he looked like a baller.

Like, he was the squarest, the most absolute
But face it, who cares when he left all that loot?
He laid the jazz on me and fled from the gig
Wailin' "Have a cool Yule and man, later, like, dig!"